If the approval is not given, the codependent will feel victimized. He keeps abusing you while you keep appeasing him. You might get wrapped up in the emotional life of the addict, riding their rollercoaster and trying to keep them stable so you can feel stable yourself. Codependency is not hereditary neither is it a congenital disease; it is a learned behavior. Two people rely on each other for support and love.
Let the person with the problem worry about it and stop putting what is not yours on yourself. Trying to please people so others will like or love the codependent: Such feelings only arise when there is an unequal commitment or feeling of worth in a relationship or marriage. Often, the relationship includes emotional or physical abuse. A therapist will be able to help you make that distinction. Today in drug rehab centers and around the therapeutic community, the term has been expanded to include other addictions and behaviors. This makes the need to feel in control paramount. It is important to know the difference between depending on another person — which can be a positive and desirable trait — and codependency, which is harmful. You might get wrapped up in the emotional life of the addict, riding their rollercoaster and trying to keep them stable so you can feel stable yourself. Life is all about actions and consequences. Two people rely on each other for support and love. You would expect that they should leave or become self-reliant but instead, they'll be working hard to please the unhealthy one even to their detriment. Children in such families learn to avoid feelings and emotions. What is a codependent relationship? Both people can express their emotions and needs and find ways to make the relationship beneficial for both of them. But even if others suggest that the person is too dependent, a person in a codependent relationship will find it difficult to leave the relationship. But in all, a lasting solution must make victim recover their sense of worth and value for total healing to take place. Many experts have submitted that a psychotherapy session may be needed for most codependents to get out of the wood. They try to take care of a person who is experiencing difficulty, but the caretaking becomes compulsive and defeating. Excusing or denying a problem like addiction means they avoid rejection by their partners. Individuals that are codependent mostly pick up the behavior during their childhood days from their caregivers or parents. The codependent is only happy when making extreme sacrifices for their partner. This psychological behavior comes into play when a person suppresses their feelings to accommodate or justify someone else's. The reason you're doing this is that you fear that if they start feeling bad about themselves, they may withdraw their affection and attention from you which is one thing you dread. In a short period of time, therapists began to notice certain behaviors that were similar among co-alcoholics and began to understand that these co-alcoholics were suffering from their own set of common problems termed codependency. Perhaps, you make it look like they are only joking with you.
Video about examples of codependent relationships:
5 Signs You're in a Codependent Relationship
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